Just in time for the holiday rushes, the TSA says it will have its so-called self-select checkpoint lanes at all of the nation’s airports by the middle of this month. This is a very good thing – if it works. The concept is relatively simple: instead of letting all airport passengers just line up and then get delayed behind the state legislator who forgets he has a .357 magnum in his briefcase (“darn, I forgot”), you can let people who think they know what they’re doing get in a lane for other smart people and the people who know they don’t know what they’re doing get in another lane. And you can have a third lane for people who aren’t sure where they should go. Are you following?
The lanes are designated by large icons that are color-coded and have different shapes – a black diamond for the
experienced travellers, including the pistol-packing state senator (“but I always take it with me”), and a nice bluish one for the casual traveller.
These travellers by the way could well be dressed in a suit and do not have to wear golf shirts and shorts to qualify as casual, even though the blue is square. Moms, pops, and other assorted infrequent flyers get in the green circle lane.
At right, we depict what the well-dressed, well-equipped state senator is tottin’ these days. These bullets, BTW, are diamonds, and they too will set off a screening machine.