They may be turkeys, but they're not that dumb. They get to ride up in first class while you have to go to the blackboard and write 100 times over, "I will not make bad jokes about United." On the other hand, they are turkeys. Two of 'em.
And they have the whole front section of a United flight to LAX from Washington tomorrow, Thanksgiving Day. And they're not just any turkeys. In Washington, these noble beasts, once championed by Benjamin Franklin to be the national symbol of the United States rather than the bald eagle, will be pardoned by the president (Bush, no jokes please) at a White House ceremony.
They will then be flown to Disneyland on 'UAL Turkey One' to the West Coast, along with a few representatives from the National Turkey Federation. There, they (the animals) will serve as the grand marshals in the Disney Thanksgiving parade. We're not sure what happens to them after that. Perhaps it's on to "Dancing with the Stars...."