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Aviation History
1961
1961 - 1835.PDF
FLIGHT, 21 December 1961 1972 . . . Members of AICMA (international aero- space constructors' association) issue state- ment blaming over-intense competition for sick state of industry in all major countries. Results of 1971 are regarded as clear warning to get back to serene atmosphere of ten years previously. Tanganyikan army evaluates its own wire- guided anti-tank missile, in competition with those produced by 196 other nations. AUGUST Biggest news of 1972! Following extensive test programme of Apollo capsule in Earth orbits, NASA announces successful landing of AA-14 on Lunar surface. Crew is Capt Cyrus B. Schmaltz, USAF; Lt Hiram B. Schmitz, USN; and Col Duke B. Hickenhackenpeffer, USMC. Location is 14 n.m. south of mid-point of Mare Imbrium. Radio message from Lunar surface is awaited. . . . After 17 days, Soviet Union offer to help locate crew of AA-14. President over- rides State Department objection that this is propaganda move. Soviet Lunar Base No 49, with permanent staff of 3,240, send out eight search parties. . . . Crew of AA-14 are discovered feverishly trying to mend radio with make- shift tools. Soviet team offer use of own radio, and say Apollo radio spares could be put aboard next replenishment launch from Baykonur. Col Hickenhackenpeffer politely declines, and says Free World must not be made to look small. He deals harshly with Capt Schmaltz, found taking part in Cossack dance, with Lunar Vodka bottle in hand. Schmaltz is carried aboard AA-14, which then departs for Earth with crew in very bad temper. . . . Crew of AA-14 ride in state through New York City, with 50 Press Officers putting finishing touches to story. Fact that Soviets are on Moon is mentioned. Radio company president is found shot. Managing directors of BAC and HSA are again asked to move on by police guarding MoA steps, and are arrested at 2 a.m., sleeping on Embankment under newspapers giving details of next stage of British Railways £780,600,000.00 electrification. GPO go-slow delays writing of press release describing plan to launch communication satel- lite "during the coming decade." Crisis in Euro/Afro/Asian Space Launcher Development Organization. While celebrating 28th anniversary of Holland's liberation in 1944, Dutch scientists shout rude names at German team responsible for third stage. To prevent recriminations, men responsible are assigned to other work, helping Indonesia develop tenth-stage propellant-loading computer. SEPTEMBER US carriers ask CAB to apply "cease and desist" order against Fuzzy-Wuzzy Airlines, claiming that serving of human flesh on "Golden Cannibal" jet services constitutes some kind of infringement. CAB cannot find chapter and verse; under terms of bilateral, US carriers should offer similar service. Soviet seismologists record Shockwaves emanating from American Mid-West, and denounce such unauthorized nuclear testing. It transpires that cause is the collapse of Mount Cheyenne, which for ten years has been in- creasingly hollowed out to house underground combat operations centre of NORAD. Idea was to make it withstand overpressure from thermonuclear fireball touching mountain. Unfortunately, need to provide staterooms for 167 additional generals and 94 senators, with dependents, so weakened structure that it gave way when B-70 flew overhead. Members of International Air-Traffic Control Association, having arrived by boat and train at conference headquarters in New York fallout shelter, reach unanimous agreement on surprise motion which solves their problems. Military authorities will control military aircraft and missiles, and civil authorities will control civil aircraft. Interchange of information between the two groups is to be discouraged, to avoid dis- tracting controllers. Marksman, the MMRBM (mobile medium- range ballistic missile) sponsored in 1961 for NATO use, remains in service only with army of Prince U Bin Puppet, whose kingdom has now shrunk to 36 square miles of Southern Viet Phong. Chief reason for withdrawal from Europe was high attrition rate. In one recent month in Germany alone, 14 were destroyed in road accidents and six mistakenly hi-jacked. It also proved unpopular with civil authorities, who could only levy standard fines for parking offences. Marksman of French army which vanished with its crew in 1965 is thought to be in Algerian quarter of Paris. OCTOBER Nine US Air Force generals are arrested by British police during sit-down demonstration in front of offices of Committee of 1,000,000. At Cannon Row police station, Gen "Tiny" Vasten- vich says, "I came over all peaceful . . . like I wanted to demonstrate it to someone." Generals are released, while police on duty cry softly. Seven underwriters on the London market are bankrupted by careless driver of fork-lift truck at Umguli Junction, in Mid-African Federation. Under influence of kaffir beer, he collides with undersurface of port wing of first BOAC UST-5C supersonic transport, causing damage provisionally assessed at £6,980,000.00. UN relief is hurriedly airlifted to over 800 RAF personnel cut off for 19 weeks in Ombo- Bongoland by infuriated tribesmen. Cause of dispute is a rumour that RAF are being unfair in supplying communities cut off by floods. NOVEMBER Hearings before FAA, PNYA, IFALPA and DOD to ascertain how 121,707,880 windows throughout Greater New York came to be broken at 0317hr on November 19, in sub-zero weather, produce no conclusive evidence. PanAm "Royal Orbit" 112-minute service to Paris, due to leave at 0300 on that day, was delayed 44hr by malfunction of port wing-droop latch. Capt Yuri Malefaktov (Aeroflot) says "In accordance with Party instructions I always apply myself diligently to the accurate handling of my glorious aircraft; and so, you must agree, I could not 949 have been responsible." Capt Basil Stratton- house (BOAC) says "Her Majesty's Vice- Consul strongly advises me not to say anything at present; and anyway my first officer was in control at the time." Only aircraft known to have been over Manhattan when disaster occurred was an S-67B of New York Airways; and assertion of its pilot, from Sing Sing, "Aw shucks, my chopper's windows were broken too," is not regarded as proof of innocence. National Coal Board receives advance of £917,000,000.00 "to help meet the industry's increasing deficit." Plea by Admiralty for £5,825.75 to finance study by HSA into re- usable version of Seaslug 3 is rejected by Treasury, who say they would be prepared to consider study into coal-burning version. British Health Service is awarded supplemen- tary vote of £365,000.000.(X). Ministry of Aviation agree to finance new BAC noiseless supersonic transport to extent of £2,500.00, provided money is recovered, plus 6 per cent interest, bv levy on all sales. DECEMBER "Flight" receives plain white card from HM Treasury, which states "The Chancellor of The Exchequer is not sending Christmas cards this year. Instead he has sanctioned the expenditure of £16.50 to be shared between the Air Ministry and Ministry of Aviation in support of a number of the most deserving new projects." . . . Chancellor receives striking Christmas card from "Flight," featuring impressionist gouache of Dorset House in low Earth orbit, ac- companied by subscription order form. After pondering various witty replies he decides not to reply at all, in view of need to curtail public expenditure. . . . Editor of "Flight" receives filled-in subscription order form from Chancel- lor, together with supplementary demand under Schedule D amounting to £125. Messrs Kennedy and Krushchev hold Summit talks at Moonbase No 5 (Sea of Tranquility). Meanwhile, London newspaper publishes report that US has "stolen the Barnes Wallis Swallow." House of Lords debates wisdom of decision to cancel Blue Streak as military weapon. "Shadow" Defence Minister claims Blue Steel Mk 8 is in development trouble. HM Comptroller-General continues investiga- tion into financing of Swift and Princess. Minister of Aviation departs for Isle of Wight to attempt export order for SR.177. Editor of Flight wades knee-deep through letters denying that the Hon Algernon Crump-Bashley wore spurs while flying his hydroplane from Metro- politan Water Board reservoir at Ponders End in 1908. Minister of Aviation announces "The air- craft industry of this country still has a part to play. In fact, I would go so far as to say that it has a future." Former aircraft designers and their families listening to the Minister of Aviation's speech at their annual reunion and garden party. This gay occasion is always held during the first week in September, at the Royal Aeronautical Museum at Farnborough
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