Top (secret) dog?

According to an American Forces Press Service report, a classic Cold War relic is about to be demolished. But it's not a missile silo, an old radar site, hardened aircraft shelter or submarine pen. No, it's the old hot dog stand in the Pentagon's centre courtyard in Washington DC. The site is rumoured to have had at least two Soviet ICBMs targeted directly at it because "using satellite imagery, the Soviets could see groups of US military officers entering and exiting the hot dog stand at about the same time every day. They concluded that the stand was the entrance to an underground bunker. They thought the officers were going to get their top secret briefings in a protected area, but really they were just going to get lunch," says the report. As it was designated a historic landmark in 1992, the hot dog stand - nicknamed "Cafe Ground Zero" - must be replaced by a building roughly the same size and shape.

Cost of hot dog: $2.00
Cost of replacement building: $1.2 million
Cost of Cold War lunacy: Priceless

"Sorry folks, but there will be a short technical delay"

Tempting fate?

As some of you may know, to most Americans the name Nimrod suggests a loser rather than "Mighty Hunter". The reason, it turns out, is because the cartoon character Daffy Duck once sarcastically used the term "my little Nimrod" to describe one of his adversaries. The term gained popularity and changed forever the course of linguistic history, as well as the chances of any possible Nimrod sales to the USA. Now it seems US popular culture may be about to score an own goal.

The US Navy's newest maritime aircraft has just been dubbed "P-8A Poseidon". "It will be an adventure for sure," says US Department of Defense watchdog Jerry Jetboy. "I think we could looking at whole new line in great disaster names: F-35 Towering Inferno, F-22 Jurassic, B-3 Sudden Impact." Oh, and let's not forget the latest European release, "A380 - From Here to Eternity".

Test pilot notes

(More scribblings from the notebook of Max Kew)
Favourite test pilot acronyms:
SHIT = software hardware induced trauma
SHIT = supersonic hurling into terrain
BC2/LT = bean counter/clerk lag time.

Worst message on multifunction display = "Congratulations: you have been randomly selected to conduct an avionics restart."

Refuelling test pilot: "A guy called Murphy told me the left [refuelling] basket had never failed and guess what? ....On the next flight it failed!"

C-5M test pilot: "The C-5 is a fighter pilot's dream! [puzzled silence all round]. "It's big, it's slow, it has a huge radar signature... what else would a fighter pilot want?"

 Read Flight from 1956 or read Uncle Roger's web log.


Source: Flight International